dear hammer of humility,

Please strike frequently and as often as you see fit on the President elect.
May he truly, truly grasp how important it is not to defend his need, his uncontrollable, pressing, unbelievably puerile need to proclaim (by way of sheer buffoonery and obstinance) that he has the biggest penis in any room.
Gentleness level at your discretion.
Frequently and often.
He must find this characteristic within himself.
He just must.